handing it over

I've been writing this post in my head for about a month. The thing about promptings is that come pretty steadily and consistently if you pay attention. And thankfully, I've been paying attention.

A couple of weeks ago, my mom and I were having one of those late night conversations that makes you feel emotionally lighter when you're done (or heavier, depending on the subject matter/person you're talking to). Also it makes your eyelids really puffy. And then the next day at work it looks like you have 2 black eyes, and people come up to you and ask if you're okay. Heh.

If there's anything I've learned in the last couple of months, it's to trust Heavenly Father completely. With that trust comes a whole lot of other things we have to give to Him. I'll explain that in a little bit. Once I decided to do that, my life became a lot easier. It felt like an anvil had been lifted from my shoulders.

Trusting in Him doesn't just mean saying "Okay, I'm going to grit my teeth and push through this trial." It also means being obedient, all the time. Eeeeep. Pride alert! I'm independent. I like to do things myself...asking for help is really hard. It's even hard for me to admit that. But I'm not admitting it so you guys will think I'm humble. Ha. Haha. This is an everyday struggle. But really...when I submit completely to those promptings, I'm always blessed. There's always a confirmation that what I did was right. And also a little "why the heck didn't I listen to that earlier?" commentary from the voice in my head that kind of sounds like Morgan Freeman...lezbehonest.

Now instead of fighting against the current, I feel like I'm just going down the stream in a nice little inner tube. Not like those giant ones we grew up using at Catherine Creek. Those got caught on tree branches and then exploded, making me almost drown and lose my shoe to the depths of the creek forevermore. #tangent

This doesn't mean the current has slowed down to a stagnant stream. Life is still tricky. It's hard to navigate. But there's always help. As a dear friend just said to me the other day, "Hope is good. Always carry it with you." I think we throw it away too often. Fight for it. Hold onto it until your knuckles go white. I've learned something else about faith: it's stronger than fear. It can beat fear up, because fear is a liar, and faith is based on truth. Sha-bam!

I came across this scripture a couple of nights ago and I just cried when I read it. Cried and cried. Because there it was. The answer!

"But behold, the righteous that hearken unto the words of the prophets, and destroy them not, but look forward unto Christ with steadfastness for the signs which are given, notwithstanding all persecution—behold, they are they which shall not perish.

But the Son of Righteousness shall appear unto them; and he shall heal them, and they shall have peace with him, until  three generations shall have passed away, and many of the fourth generation shall have passed away in righteousness."

2 Nephi 26: 8-9 (emphasis added)

"She Will Find What Is Lost" 

by Brian Kershisnik

 (probably one of my most favorite paintings ever)

Work in place of worry. Faith in place of fear.