beto's is sicknasty and youths go there late at night, you've been warned

oh blessed horchata

Once upon a time it was Tuesday night and I was doing dishes and daydreaming about the horchata I had consumed earlier.

This horchata was originally meant for Eric-face but on the way to take it to him I started to drink it (90 DEGREES, PEOPLE. 90 DEGREES) and then I finished drinking it and then I left him a message on his phone that went like this:

"Well I might've hypothetically gotten you a horchata and hypothetically had a sip...JUST A SIP."

Ha. The lies!

Then I went home and passed out on my bed.

#isitfallyet

I hate that I speak in hashtag, but I still do it.

Then again, I also hate that I always, always, miss shaving my kneecaps somehow when I shave my legs, and that I have to have peanut butter every day, and that I also need to be barefoot almost always but along with that cannot go to bed with dirty feet.

Do you see my predicament? Gosh. Sometimes I'm just so...human.

Anyway.

Back to the horchata.

Eric-face told me his finals were lame (duh) so I said "HORCHATA" but not exactly like that, and about one hour later, we met up at Beto's again because why not. I was totally embarrassed when I walked in and the same girl was at the counter from whom I ordered my last horchata, only 4 hours previous.

What'err. H8rs gon' h8. <---I hate that too.

Approximately three really gross things happened while we were there, but I'm only going to say one for the sake of any children reading this. Amen.

Eric was in the middle of his giganto al pastor plate, and I was in the middle of my fourth lime wedge (canker sores up the heezy) when these stinkin' youths behind us said "egg sac" and "propel" in the same sentence.

At this point, I stopped talking mid-sentence and gagged and Eric made a brilliant disgusted face that looked like this

and then he said, "Did we both just witness that together?"
I had to nod because I was still laughing, and gagging, simultaneously.

Lagging? No, already a word. Hmm...Gaffing?

Okay, this is getting worse.

The point is, don't go to Beto's late at night because youths will come in there and talk about disgusting things and you might also find disgusting things on the table where you ate, and then you might get hepatitis.

/end