8.14.2013

for my future McHubz Face







if you wanna marry me, there are only a few requirements.
1) sing
2) play an instrument 
3) do both at the same time
4) make me a pb & banana sandwich for no reason

BOOM.

Now I'll just sit here patiently and wait for all my suitors to come.

Or maybe one of you has a backstage pass to see Ben Howard and I can just get that whole marriage proposal over with? Yeah?

DO ME A SOLID.

Now, since I'm on this subject of future prospects, let me share with you this gem from my an old journal. Yes, yes, sadly I fell victim to the whole "make a huge long list of all the qualities and attributes you want in your future spouse and be super specific." That list made it impossible to date for awhile. A boy would ask me out and I'd be like, "Wait, wait, hold up, my list says not to be interested in anybody who doesn't have blue eyes. So...sorry. Send me a postcard?"

What they should've told us to do was "make a huge long list of all the attributes and qualities you want to have in yourself when you're ready to get married and be super specific." But I digress.

So, in the name of solidarity, I now share with you, my homeskillets and homepaninipresses (what?) some of my favorites from my list, circa 2010 (yeah, not that long ago..erp. can't believe I just admitted to that on the world wide web. then again, I have a BLOG on the world wide web. enough said.):

my other half (yes that's what it's called, h8rs gon' h8)
1) no skinny jeans, yes you heard me ha...just...no. idk why I had to put this on here. if any prospect out there is wearing skinny jeans he's probably still in middle school, thus taking him right out of the "prospect" category.
2) can cook a little bahahaha...okay. so when I was in college I discovered that I actually love to cook for people...so this became hugely irrelevant. future hubz, if you're reading this (Ben? is that you?), I hope you don't mind free food because it's coming your way. and also, it's dericious.
3) will rub my back ya.....this still stands. amen. goodnight.
4) not obssessed with sports but still digs them ???????????? that's a direct quote, errybody. I just don't even know! My present self would like to salmon-slap my past self. But isn't that how it always is?

I'll leave you with a lyric from good ol' Ben Howard up there. In one of my favortiest songs by him, he says "I will become what I deserve." So to whoever's reading this...do that. Things will work out.

And that's a wrap.

Sorry I don't actually have prizes for those of you who finished this. If you live nearby, come get an otter pop! ...but not right now because I'm actually in my bed and everyone in my house is asleep. Ha! Can you imagine?

throngs of kenzie's blog readers showing up at her door, clamoring for an autograph otter pop....
(they sound the same! kind of)
parentals: you've gotta be karate-kidding me. it's 12 in the AM.
mckenzie: oh yes but they finished my entire pointless blog post about murrage because I am 100% (not) qualified to write posts about that!
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